One of the things I say in Al-anon meetings is; “trust God.” When associating with a dysfunctional alcoholic it can be confusing at times to think God loves us, let alone to put our trust in him. Many question his existence because they are having to go through such difficult times in life.
Establishing a Relationship
As we interact with others, isn’t this where trust begins? Having faith in someone is something that develops over time. To fully have faith in a person, we must believe in their abilities.
If I was Renovating a House
I wouldn’t just let anyone remodel my house. There has to be a trial period where the contractor wins me over and convinces me to have faith in his company. He must show up on time for appointments, provide the information he has promised within the time frame that he promised to deliver it before I will trust him. He has to prove that he is a good listener by including everything in the estimate that we discussed.
The same is true in establishing a relationship with God. It takes time to get to know him, just as it takes time to establish a trustworthy relationship with a real estate broker or anyone in life. God will prove to us that he is real when we start to talk to him and seek to know him. If we will seek him-we will find him.
Faith Begins as the Relationship Develops
One real God experience will be poured into our empty faith glass and we will begin to see Him differently. We will trust God more as he continues to reveal himself by answering our prayers and letting us know that he is with us.
Eventually, we will have a firm foundation that we cannot be moved from because the relationship has developed to a point where we have total trust in God. When we reach this point, we can truly call ourselves “believers.”
Many Alcoholics Have Faith in God to Get Sober
The AA program is very clear about three things.
1) We were powerless over alcohol and could not manage our own lives
2) A power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity
3) God could and would “if” He were sought.
The twelve steps of AA and Al-anon are designed to gently bring us into a relationship where we fully trust God. The first step helps us to realize that we are powerless and the rest are designed for us to experience the reality of God’s power.
My experiences with God have brought me to the place where I simply trust him no matter what. In the good times and through the bad, I just trust him. This great faith that I have took several years of Him proving his faithfulness to me before it was established in a rock solid way. The training for me happened through dealing with an active alcoholic. I had to continually turn my will over to God and the alcoholic over to him as well.
The situation I was involved in caused many damaging emotions to be present in my life. I was forced to call out to my higher power for help. This process of asking for help began to develop as I continued to attend alcoholism support group meetings.
Hopelessness
Despair
Depression
Anxiety
Fear
Anger
All of the negative emotions above will have little place in our lives once our faith is built up to be strong. How do we get strong faith? Through having the opportunity for our trust in God to grow stronger. It is the difficult situations in our lives that shape and mold our faith. Coping with as problem drinker was the most difficult thing I had ever done. I have experienced all of these negative emotions with a great level of intensity because of my interaction with the alcoholic in my life.
God loves us no matter what. He will be working in our lives if we have made a decision to seek Him. Trust him today with your life and with the alcoholic that you care about. “Let go and let God.”
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I am finding a lot of resentment because my husband has stopped drinking again and he goes to alot of meetings so he says but his attitude is still not too good…I am trying to talk to him alone and with
a counselor friend but he really does not want to talk honestly about anything that he has done because of his drinking which has and still is affecting our marriage….we are and have been separated for a year now and he says he wants to get back together but just move on is his attitude…but I think we have to talk or else nothing will ever change…..he had stopped drinking for 12 years and was really into AA but started drinking again 10 years ago. My feeling is he doesn’t want to do the work or take the time or go back…he wants to get on with his life…but I have hung in there and now I just have to suck it up if we are going to get back together…am I being unrealistic that someday he might understand where I am coming from? also,he had an affair which is another real big issue..any advice would be good at this point